Advocating Against Romance Scammers – The Team

It has been said that there are three significant must-haves for people from different walks of life to come together and unite for a specific cause. We have found that accurate as Advocating Against Romance Scammers has evolved and blossomed over the years. 

A common objective, mutual respect, and practical teamwork help build a cohesive group dynamic where the focus remains on the cause rather than on the differences among the participants.

 Although romance scams have impacted each board member in very different ways, the impacts were strong enough to rouse a sense of advocacy and desire for justice in each member. The shared passion to right this wrong has not only fueled commitment and tenacity as a team but has forged incredible relationships that none of us would experience if not for this common cause. 

Who is the AARS Team

From social work to law enforcement, fintech, and banking to entertainment, and the military to health technology, the AARS board brings a myriad of ages, education, experiences, and viewpoints to the table. It has become abundantly clear that this combination enables a deep reach into the wide variety of romance scams and fraud victims and insights into victimization, scams, and fraud techniques. 

Read on to learn more about each one of them.

What is your background story as to why you were compelled to join AARS and serve the victim community? 

I served my country for 26 years, dedicating myself to protecting those who couldn’t defend themselves, often overseas in dangerous situations. To later discover that my image was being exploited by scammers preying on vulnerable people is deeply upsetting. When this started in July 2016, I knew I couldn’t ignore it. Kathy and I created AARS to help those affected by romance scams and try to ease their pain.

Are there cases that have impacted you and contributed to your increased drive to raise awareness about these scams?

While it is easy to grow a little numb from the barrage of fake pics and profiles I have seen daily over the past 9 years, some illicit more emotion than others.  I take particular offense to a photo of me at the graveside of one of my fallen Soldiers being used by scammers. The image does what it is supposed to do, pull at the heartstrings, but the thought that it is being used to take advantage of people, something this Soldier would have never wanted, nor does he have a voice to protest, will continue to keep me in this fight. 

Also, the messages that my wife receives from women claiming to be in a relationship with me are always hard to accept. From verbal abuse to threats of violence, the assault on her and my children is just something we live with. I don’t believe it will ever end, but I know it won’t if I just pretend it doesn’t happen. My fallen Soldier and my family deserve better.  

 Since your involvement with AARS, have you had an “AHA!” moment that solidified your commitment?

When Kathy and I first met with Facebook, they claimed to have never heard of romance scams despite telling me I was one of the top 3 replicated profiles on their platform. Clearly, they could track fake profiles but lacked the will to remove them. Any hope that they’d police their platform or uphold community standards quickly vanished, and we realized this would be a long, frustrating fight.

If resources were not an issue, name one thing you would want AARS to do soon to raise awareness and serve more victims.

With unlimited resources, I envision AARS as the epicenter for romance scam awareness and prevention, offering victims counseling and emotional and financial support. It could also serve as a data hub, providing authorities with information to help prosecute scammers and dismantle their networks.

What is your background story as to why you were compelled to join AARS and serve the romance scam victim community? 

A romance scammer targeted my mother’s friend. Like most individuals, I had heard of the scam but had no idea of its depth. After months of research and speaking with other scammed victims, I began to realize that there was an incredible lack of awareness and education surrounding online romance fraud.

Are there cases that have impacted you and contributed to your increased drive to raise awareness about these scams?

I encountered a victim trapped in an abusive marriage with young children, who sought to escape but fell victim to a romance scam. Believing in a relationship built on trust, she was instead manipulated and deceived, leading her to take her life. This tragic experience deeply influences my advocacy and fight for scam victims. 

Since your involvement with AARS, have you had an “AHA!” moment that solidified your commitment?

I believe every message from a scam victim is an AHA! moment. While it’s bittersweet—no one wants to advocate for victims—the sweet part is knowing they feel understood, safe, and supported in a compassionate, judgment-free space.

If resources were not an issue, name one thing you would want AARS to do soon to raise awareness and serve more victims.

Prevention: Unite organizations worldwide—advocates, financial institutions, law enforcement, celebrities, victims, and more—to create a universal PSA that spreads across social media, TV, schools, and publications, educating everyone on avoiding online romance scams.

Post-Scam: AARS having the resources to offer free therapeutic programs, including support groups, classes, and one-on-one counseling by licensed therapists specializing in relationship scams.

What is your background story as to why you were compelled to join AARS and serve the victim community? 

As an FBI Special Agent in Norfolk, Virginia, I investigated online fraud and learned that romance scammers were using Colonel Bryan Denny’s Facebook photos to defraud women. I met Kathy Waters, whose family friend lost $35,000 to a scammer using Bryan’s identity. Thousands of fake accounts were created, leading Kathy and Bryan to start Advocating Against Romance Scammers (AARS). After retiring from the FBI, Kathy invited me to join AARS’s Board of Directors to continue raising awareness about this crime.

Are there cases that have impacted you and contributed to your increased drive to raise awareness about these scams?

I investigated online fraud cases for 23 years with the FBI. In investment fraud, victims are driven by greed and promises of high returns, while romance fraud victims are emotionally manipulated by scammers posing as romantic partners. I worked on complex international romance fraud cases, often involving West African perpetrators. I witnessed two successful prosecutions, with a Nigerian and a Ghanaian extradited to the U.S. for using similar scam tactics.

 Since your involvement with AARS, have you had an “AHA!” moment that solidified your commitment?

Kathy and Bryan shared how they repeatedly met with Facebook’s Security team and reported thousands of fake accounts using Bryan’s photos, but Facebook resisted removing them. This made me realize that, since social media platforms aren’t addressing fraudulent accounts, organizations like AARS are essential for raising awareness and supporting victims of romance fraud.

If resources were not an issue, name one thing you would want AARS to do soon to raise awareness and serve more victims.

We would spread information widely, using AARS’s presence on every social media platform to reach more victims. We would plan conferences in major cities, presentations at other events, and ads on radio and TV, continuing until victim numbers are nearly eliminated.

What is your background story as to why you were compelled to join AARS and serve the victim community? 

I have a background in financial services, specializing in risk and compliance. I have also been trained in fraud prevention and legal obligations to protect consumers and prevent money laundering. I am educated and knowledgeable about banks’ legal obligations to protect consumers and avoid money laundering. 

Are there cases that have impacted you and contributed to your increased drive to raise awareness about these scams?

 The hopelessness I felt, and my inability to fully protect a family member from such victimization compelled me to become more involved. While I was able to help my family members in the long run, there are many others I want to help.

 Since your involvement with AARS, have you had an “AHA!” moment that solidified your commitment?

For me, a large one is the fantastic board team, the variety of direct experiences we share, and how they intertwine. If I had to pick one moment, it would be my trip to DC with the group, where we could tell the romance scam story out loud multiple times and how it all seamlessly wove together.

If resources were not an issue, name one thing you would want AARS to do soon to raise awareness and serve more victims.

Changing laws to protect consumers and fully prosecute scammers in every case. 

What is your background story as to why you were compelled to join AARS and serve the victim community? 

My mother died in 2020 while she was involved with a romance scammer named “Gerald” who stole $350,000 from her all while she was battling ovarian cancer. At the time, there was very little information on the subject, and AARS was one of my resources.

Are there cases that have impacted you and contributed to your increased drive to raise awareness about these scams?

I interviewed a victim in California who opened a can of worms for a scammer living in the United States. After discovering that episode, twenty women found each other and came together to fight for justice. Authorities won’t file criminal charges because the women “gave their money away.” However, the women hired an attorney and alerted the IRS, and the federal government is now going after him for their cut of his “financial services.”

 Since your involvement with AARS, have you had an “AHA!” moment that solidified your commitment?

My AHA moment came before I joined the AARS board, which is why I joined the fight. After my mother’s scam, I checked in with each romance scam organization for answers and interviews. I found several bad actors, and AARS rose to the top of my mind for always prioritizing the victims and not using the subject for any notoriety.

If resources were not an issue, name one thing you would want AARS to do soon to raise awareness and serve more victims.

It’s a big goal, but I think we can achieve it. I’d love to see AARS speak before all types of Congress committees about the need to address the issue.

 

What is your background story as to why you were compelled to join AARS and serve the victim community? 

When my boss’s identity was stolen and used for romance scams, I became the very first person the victims spoke to when they were searching for answers. Their grief, shock, and helplessness were so impactful upon me that I had to ‘do something, anything’ to help. 

Are there cases that have impacted you and contributed to your increased drive to raise awareness about these scams?

 Intending to report it to law enforcement after, I called the Florida recipient of a $10,000 check sent by a victim at the request of her online boyfriend. To my shock, the recipient of the money was “dating” the same online scammer, and both were unknowingly being used as money mules. It made me sick to reveal the truth to them both. 

 Since your involvement with AARS, have you had an “AHA!” moment that solidified your commitment?

I report fake profiles using my boss’s name or images, especially both. One year, I reported over 800 false social media profiles, which didn’t include overseas or dating apps. Although discouraged early in the fight, we finally have a much higher take-down rate. Every profile down could be one less victim. I’m in. 

If resources were not an issue, name one thing you would want AARS to do soon to raise awareness and serve more victims.

I’d love AARS to host a two-day conference for fraud fighters, victims, and their counselors, providing a space for support, learning, and encouragement. The focus would be to offer victims an affordable, respectable venue to connect with resources tailored to their needs.

When it is all said and done, remember:

The Advocating Against Romance Scammers board supports your recovery, whether you’re a scam, identity theft, or trafficking victim. We’re here for you.

• Do not blame yourself:
  Romance scams are designed to exploit people’s emotions, and it’s not your fault if you were targeted. 
• Be vigilant:
  When meeting people online, always be cautious about sharing personal information, and never send money to someone you haven’t met in person. 
• Seek support:
  If you are experiencing emotional distress from the scam, consider contacting a trusted friend, family member, or mental health professional. 

We welcome anyone passionate about raising awareness and changing laws concerning online fraud to get involved in the fight. Whether alongside AARS, our partners, or any other fraud and scam fighting groups, your voice makes a difference. We are only stronger when we fight together. 

We welcome and are grateful for your financial support of AARS’s work.